Once I identified what “I'm feeling”, then I can trace the route and head towards my north; meaning, once I verified my feeling or emotion, then I can decide consciously what to do to reach my “north”, and stop wandering lost. The compass always points north and can help me to see where I am, and where I want to go! This is especially important for those who mistakenly learned to deny and invalidate their feelings, desires, emotions, sense of reality, and intuition. For those who learned to pretend that "nothing happened" justifying the events and denying their feelings, thoughts and intuition. For those who learned that their feelings do not matter, but the ones from others, do.
There are no “positive or negative emotions”, they are just
the answer to a certain situation. In fact we were created with all sort of emotions by The Father, and He doesn’t make mistakes! We are not guilty to feel the so call “bad emotions” as anger, jealousy, envy etc etc. Although, whatever we do based on these emotions will affect how effective, useful and adaptive results we may have. Every emotional answer is positive if it drive us to resolve conflicts, to evolve, to conquer goals and objectives, to relate with the world around us and with us. The challenge is to listen and attend what I feel, think and perceive, in order to act properly, to avoid “masking”, and to set healthy boundaries.
For example, to feel angry can indicate that I’m going through unfair and abuse actions…. My emotional and physical health will be affected if I deny the right I have to feel angry; if I deny the right to defend myself; if I repress those emotions and act as if I don’t feel them; if I act under the false premise that being “angry” is a lack of respect with the authority.
A repress angriness as frustration, anger, guilt, deception etc, is harmful for the health. Is a powerful energy that should be processed and drawn out, cause otherwise can point towards ourselves! That is why is so important to watch it, understand it, embrace it, recognize its origin, validate it, recognize to whom is pointing. Once its “message” has been understand, then take actions, decisions and let it go because already its message has been given. To ignore it, repress it, minimize it, reduce it etc, are not options that will make us free.
The writer Jose Luis Canales said: “Just if you accept the pain of having been abused, if you recognize it, if you feel it, if you live it and if you heal it, then you will be able to be joyful. Recover the sense of being vulnerable (trust that you can be yourself without being criticized, judged or mistreated) and the sense of reality (to perceive the facts as they are and not from the perspective of a painful childhood).”
MAKING YOUR EMOTIONAL COMPASS
The idea is to design and produce your emotional compass that points to your “north” and helps reminding to keep in that direction. In my case, the “north” is to feel inner peace and serenity, even the storms of the daily life.
Steps to follow:
• Build / draw your emotional compass and save it where you can see it once in a while as a reminder.
• Define your “north”, meaning how you want to feel mostly
• Define the “south”, meaning the opposite of your north
• Define your emotions table, where you list the main emotions that bother you more often (while you feel them), with its correspondent trigger and action to reach the “north”
Table EMOTIONS Vs TRIGGER and FIXING ACTION (Personal)
This table is useful to build the personal compass and also to use later; it will help me identifying the emotion I’m feeling in a certain moment, and will remind me what can be the cause and the path to take… mostly are logical things that we easily know; just that when the so call “bad emotion” is all over us, we tend to forget simple things as these; therefore the importance of working out this table in a moment of peace.
In order to be really effective, it should be design by me and for me…. With whatever applies to me, no matter what others can say!
EMOTION – TRIGGER – ACTION
Anger – Unfair events and abuse – Protect myself and forgive
Rage – “How is possible that this is done to me!”, Ego – Exercise humility
Hurt – a wound that has to be heal – let off steam and aloud myself to heal
USING YOUR COMPASS IN DAILY LIFE
This is very useful when you go through any of the so call “negative emotions” as anger, insecurity, etc etc
1. Check where you are: take the compass, breathe deeply 3 times from the abdomen and verify what are you feeling.
2. Check in your compass what can be triggering your emotion
3. Close your eyes and accept the “message” that the emotion is giving you; be thankful and express it because no matter how boring can be to feel that emotion, it is an important communication; … now that it’s task has been accomplish, let it go!... say goodbye to it…
4. Check the “north” in your compass and focus in it, so you take that direction. The action of watching it, knowing you wrote it, has a very powerful inner impact!
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